I haven't been up to anything

I'd like to think that you guys can get a sense of what is going on in my life by even what I DON'T write. I blog about nothing, therefore I am up to nothing...

Yeah.... sorry for the 3 week black out. I can't promise that it's going to get better anytime soon. Work is going great and "training" for the half marathon in 20 days is going swell. I can run 4.5 miles WITHOUT STOPPING!!!!!!!

Actually the last 3 weeks encompassed St. Patty's day, The Iranian New Years, a couple of dates and loads of great times with my awesome friends. Liz and I might of accidentally broke "open container" laws the weekend prior to last, Shan & I tried out a great new-ish restaurant yesterday, and my TV may or may not be haunted. That is yet to be determined.

Shout Outs Haiku Style

Carey saved my life
Her French press makes good coffee
Damn, she is married

Megan’s feet still hurt
Dance dance dance dance dance dance dance
Limp home with sore toes

Can’t wait for Nily
Big sister coming to town
We’re gonna rock it

Tammy needs diet
New nickname, fittingly: Tammu
Bye bye Fat Tammy!

Sarah hates Chicos
Lets initiate HotB.A.C.
Plan B: scrote attack!

Shea proposed marriage
She bought me for 2 chickens
My parents agreed

Jennie's got a girl
So happy my friend's in love
Lesbo's move so fast

Becky - I love you!
Spaghetti dinner; call me
Eat our weight in noodles

Run Run, Amy, Run
Thirteen point one mile? EASY!
Drag me to the finish

Daniel. St. Pat's Day
Drink waaaay too much, crash on couch
Looking forward, bro!

Liz, thanks for the gift
Works perfect, better even
Girl - you got my back

Shannan, oh babies!
Scarlett, Simon and Gavin
Kiss them for me please

Sergei......Ser-GHEY if you ask me.

I succumbed to internal pressures and created an online dating profile a couple of weeks ago. And while I’ve had a couple of exchanges with some lads, none have been this… well, you can chose your own adjective.

Back story. Boy emails Girl - they have a witty exchange. Flirtatious, even. They agree to meet. On the fly, Tuesday, he asks her to meet up at this store she recommend he go to "Ok, I'll call you when I am leaving work."

So I do. Since I told him I was going to call him at 5 and could meet him at 5:10, I called. He says he's “currently at a bookstore across town” and “would get there too late and wouldn't want me to wait” and blah blah blah.... whatever. He asks if he could call me later. Sure. Whatever. Kinda rude, but whatever.

I head home to work on my picture framing project (I can't wait to finish and show you guys...) and he calls around 5:30 and is all apologies. He continues on about still wanting to meet up tonight, to which I'm like "ok dude, that's fine" and he says to meet up at the Broadway Cafe which totally works for me since it's in my neighborhood.

And this is the strange part.

He says "Well, it's rush hour now, so, I'm going to head home and wait for traffic to dissipate and then give you a call and we can meet up."

Um. What???? "OK" is what came out of my mouth, but the whole thing made little sense.

7 o'clock rolls around and I hadn't received word. I went to Liz's place downstairs and we talk about it for a minute... talk about other things .... and then realized that we still had our Valentines Wine... so we busted that out. And then we decided to go to the Record Bar and continue drinking and to dance. And then at 8 fvcking 30, I get a text "Hey Natasha..."

SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

at 9, after getting ready and a bit more drunk, I respond "hey, I'm on my way out. I am so sad we did not have the chance to meet up this evening."

His response: I know I'm sorry it didn't work out, perhaps another day?

Natasha's response: Perhaps.

The End. I haven't spoken to him since, and honestly, this guy can go blow himself. How weird are you with the whole "not driving in traffic thing" and also how RUDE are you to stand me up for a simple cup of coffee? Next.

Getting wine drunk on a Tuesday night always SOUNDS like a good idea....

....and that is because IT IS!

So, last night rocked. In fact, the entire day rocked. I was able to find E.X.A.C.T.L.Y. what I was looking for, picture frame wise, at this cool furniture consignment store. I mean, not only did I find the exact number & style & shape & size I was looking for... I got 8 frames for under $40. And they are all bad ass too.

And then I got stood up 3 times by some guy.... all in the course of 4 hours. This story will come later. It's a good one.

And then Liz and I decided to drink wine and go see live music at The Record Bar. Yadda, yadda, yadda the night ended with 2 drunk girls scarfing down pizza while watching "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." Funniest. Show. Ever.

Ghetto Fabulous (skinny) Mocha Latte

I recently nixed my Coffee Mate Fat Free French Vanilla Creamer from my diet because it had 50 calories per 4 tsp (TEASPOON!!!!!!!) serving. That's whack.

Anyway, so I started using a combination of Splenda mixed with a little bit of dry non-fat milk. This does the trick and is yummy! HOWEVER I just stumbled upon a delicious mix for a ghetto fabulous mocha latte, starbucks style!

One packet of sugar free hot cocoa mix
non-fat dry milk
coffee

Stir.

YUM!

Enjoy and You're Welcome.

They're Here!

The 6 pairs of shoes I bought have arrived at my local, neighborhood Payless Shoe Source location. I get to go pick them up tonight, they are going to LOVE living with me!

There isn't a whole lot of new Natasha Fabulousness to report on. I had a wonderful Valentine's day with Liz, though some yahoo named Jack and his over-medicated friend Jimmy tried to crash it. It's a long story. And by that I mean I don't ever want to re-tell it.

I had a lovely weekend, lots of friends, babies and alcohol. Not always at the same time. Side note: All of Shannan's triplets are MOBILE NOW!!!! Happy belated 9 month birthday to you, Scarlett, Simon & Gavin!

OH! I almost forgot. There is a HOT new hot yoga teacher. Sweet Sweat of all that is good and Holy, his body is rockin! I've never had the pleasure of being that sweaty and gross and that close to naked with someone THAT hot. He could, potentially, get me to do anything he wanted if he's not careful. OR if he IS careful, depending on how you look at it.

Oh, and I'm still single. Anyone want to fix that? ::coughcoughMegan::

Meeting Afentra was the BEST part.

If I'm not listening to NPR, I'm listening to 96.5 The Buzz and while I like the afternoon guy... I LOVE AFENTRA, the morning personality (and coincidentally, the afternoon guy's wife). I've loved Afentra since she first showed up in KC around 10 years ago. This rough-around-the-edges Greek was my kind of girl. She's bossy, vulgar & entirely politically incorrect. Love.

I've wanted to be her friend for a long time. Image my opportunistic elation when I found out a friend/acquaintance of mine knows her! This could be my way in (Sarah - this should in no way reflect negatively on my genuine fondness of you... regardless of your Afentra Status), finally after years of dreaming and hoping from afar, I have an inside man.

Fast forward to Friday night. "Afentra's VD Party" is her annual (free) Valentines day concert and Liz and I went. First thing first: Major sausage-fest. CHA-CHING! But, that's not even the best part. Liz and I find our corner and start on our beers (Actually, "continue" rather than "start" since we started at my apartment and had a nice buzz even before we got downtown. Don't worry mom, we took a taxi). The concert was held at the Historic Midland theater, and it is a fucking beaut. There were so many works of art and pretty rooms and fixtures to look at, but that's not even the best part.

The concert was getting close to over and I hear HER voice. I knew she was close, so I scanned the crowd looking for my Greek Goddess. When my eyes fell on her, I knew that the wait had been worth it. She is beautiful and looks like she would have no problem kicking my ass.

I wish I could remember everything that happened!!!!!!!

What I DO remember is going up to her and demanding her attention. I started in on my undying love for her and how much I want to be her friend and I couldn't shut up. I wanted to shut up, I knew that I should have probably stopped talking right after I said "HI!" but NOOOOOOOOO I kept going on and on about I don't even remember what. Towards the end I think I was just shouting random words like "Half-Iranian!!!" and "Blog!" The poor dear was trying to get away but I had PHYSICALLY LATCHED myself to her arm and wouldn't let go.

I would be upset, but this was the best part of the entire evening. And that's saying something since the evening didn't end until 4AM. Liz and I broke lots of hearts, met lots of cool chicks (A shout out to Linda & her sister and Bobbi the Flapper!) and accidentally came into possession of some guys anxiety prescription. But, that part wasn't our fault.

Oh, and Sarah - I am SO sorry but I told Afentra that you know me.