Tuesday, June 10, 2008


I wouldn't characterize myself as commitment-phobic. Rather, I'd say that I'm just really, really open to change and want to be able to change at a moments notice. A lot of people would say that people who are unable to commit are insecure and unable to think for themselves; always relying on others or changing their minds at the last second due to their flaky nature. I say I just have a short attention span and really have no clue what I am doing this Saturday so why bothering asking on a Wednesday!

With that being said, I will be making a commitment. With a guy. I know this may come as a shock for most of you, and for those of you not shocked yet... the guy in question is gay.

Now you're shocked. And maybe confused.

My gym membership is month to month. I like it this way. There is no contract to sign, no membership fees or dues and no cancellation charges. Wham-Bam Thank-You Ma'am. Nice and easy. We're still talking about my gym membership.

However, there are other options. A two-some can go month to month at a discounted rate. And a two-some can buy 6 months at an even more discounted rate. I've been asked to be someones gym two-some. This is both an honor and completely frightening. Do I see myself going to this gym in 6 months time? Yes. Do like the idea of saving about $75? Yes. Do I like the fact that I am now part of a "couple?" No. Though, it is befitting that one of my most significant relationships at this point in my life BE with a gay man, I just don't know if I am ready yet. I know I can trust him and I know that he'll always honestly tell me how I look in my workout outfit.

I suppose that this is good practice for me to not be so afraid of making commitments. Going through this could make me less prone to anxiety when making plans more than a week out. Or choosing an outfit to wear in the morning. Or ordering lunch.

So, wish me luck everyone. Hopefully this will all work out for the best. The good thing is that we're both aware that this is a relationship of convenience, nothing more is excepted of either of us. A commitment with low expectations is hopefully one that I won't eff up.

1 comment:

Stevester said...

Good luck! I just wanted to offer some words of wisdom though, a commitment of convenience and low expectations is both how I lost my virginity and got married, and the reason I am almost always broke, so....you know what I have no idea where I am going with this. Does this mean you will not commit to having lunch with me and Smeagol?