Friday, November 21, 2008

Professional Job Changer

For those who’ve cared to pay attention, I’ve been employed at 3 different companies over the past 13 months. The stress of changing jobs (not to mention, employers) has eclipsed itself and I have now fallen into a routine of change. I have become an expert at signing HR forms and New Employee Handbooks. I can give my two weeks notice in my sleep.

I have become so good at changing jobs that I didn’t have to even look for this latest one; it found me. It fell into my lap like a belated birthday present, all wrapped up with pretty paper and a bow.

Starting Monday I will become a member of the Marketing Department as a Proposal Writer I. Unfortunately, this isn’t a role for writing marriage proposals for guys lazy and/or unoriginal enough to come up with their own on-bended-knee speeches. But how cool would that be? Actually, does anyone know if this is a real job that I could pursue? I would be awesome at that. I mean, I have experienced 2 out of the 3 worst marriage proposals a girl could get, so I have a baseline of what NOT to say.

First there was the guy I said yes to. He didn’t even get down on one knee. And the ring didn’t fit. His speech was so uninspired that I wasn’t quite sure he was proposing until he shoved the ring in front of me and mumbled something about eternal happiness and fulfillment. And even then, I still wasn’t sure if he wanted to get married or if he was asking for my Cheesecake Factory leftovers.

Then there was the guy I said no to, but then again I had only known him for about 3 hours and I was fairly confident that his semi-tipsy proposals weren’t meant to be taken seriously.

And finally, there is the worst way to get proposed to: after getting knocked up the baby’s daddy says “So, I guess we should get married now.”

Let’s keep hope alive that I will NEVER be proposed to that way.

3 comments:

Sairen said...

Eric gave me the ring hidden in a really sweet gift that he explained briefly to me. I confess I did have to prompt for the actual question, the but intent was clear. ;)

I tease because I care.

GucciLittlePiggy said...

The one I said yes to was also very uninspired, in fact, I thought he was breaking up with me until he actually did the deed. Oh, and yeah, my ring didn't fit either.

Stevester said...

The baby daddy thing hit below the belt, you just ruined all the romance I thought I had conjured up in my marriage. Seriously, though I just grunted at my wife and said something like "Grrgrrr.....marry" and years later here we are!