Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Dear O'Reilly Auto Parts at I-435 & Stateline:

Suck. It.

You are either, collectively, an incompetent bastard or a chauvinistic bastard. But a bastard none-the-less.

Here is what I know about my car:

-It's White
-It has 4 doors
-It needs gas to run

I am not ashamed of my lack of automobile knowledge. But shame on YOU for trying to make me feel like a dumb ass.

When my passenger side head light went out I thought to myself "Rosie the Riveter said I can do it!" so I decided to change it myself. "It is just a light bulb," I reasoned, "it should be the same principle as every other light bulb I've changed in my life."


You see, O'Reilly Auto Parts at I-435 & Stateline, it is impossible to change a headlight successfully when given THE WRONG FUCKING PART.

I guess it is my bad, O'Reilly, for assuming that when your "clerk" asked for my make and model of car, that I'd be given the appropriate bulb. How OB-fucking-TUSE of me. I guess when I said "2004 Honda Accord" that it was just mere small talk between him and I. If I had known he'd just hand me a random light bulb, I would have said something a little more "me," like "take a shower, kid, your hair looks gross and greasy."

I spent 30 minutes in the cold trying to get that SOB to work. But well played, O'Reilly, for giving me a bulb that looks JUST like the bulb I need minus 1 teeny tiny plastic "thing" on the inside of the electrical source do-hickey-thingie-ma-bob.

I was on the verge of throwing in the towel (or bulb, as it were), and declaring defeat against anything vehicle related. I was this close to agreeing only to re-fueling and topping off washer fluid as approved Natasha-Car-Maintenance-Activities.

And that is why you can suck it. For making me doubt my abilities and for forcing me to stay out in the cold.

I'll be back for my refund shortly.




Anonymous said...

You sir are a fucking dumbass and dealing with people like you is the worst part of the parts business. First of all it is not up to me to know what kind of car or truck you drive or what the fuck motor it has because ITS NOT MY FUCKING CAR ! and maybe you should know the correct information to get the correct part. Dont be a dumbass know the information before you enter the door. Its not my job to tell you everything you need to know about your car. You fucking idiot ! go fuckyourself and buy a bike wait just walk because you probably wouldnt know anything about the bike either wait no dont walk because you alsp to stupid to know what size shoe you wear and couldnt figure how to put them on so just sit on your ass and do nothing better yet off yourself do the world a favor...

Anonymous said...

They are incredible snobs at O'Reilly. What these guys really need to understand is that each customer is different. Some will gladly spill their knowledge to the mechanic (whether right or wrong) while others could really use some help. When I first started as a mechanic (in the late 90s), I had very little knowledge and was relying on sites like Mortec and ChevyTalk for engine numbers and other auto parts information. I still refer to the books I bought on Amazon that refer to various parts and have no shame whatsoever in using manuals. I think Advanced Auto Parts might be a little better than O'Reilly in this regard, but to be honest, all big shops are the same.