Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Natasha’s Top 8 (and sometimes embarrassing) Moments of 2008

Since 2008 didn’t suck nearly as hard as 2007* did, I’ll be reflecting today on its highlights.

Drum roll please…….

#8 New Jobs.
In 2008 I got 2 new jobs. There was the exodus from “Cockton” to my current and beloved employer in May and then my departmental transfer/promotion in late November. I think that after a tumultuous 13 months of bouncing around job wise, I have found my niche and am happy. YAY!

#7 I got a TV
In 2007 I decided to be TV Free and wasn’t content enough to just NOT turn on my set, but felt the need to give the old boob tube away. SO I did. And then 9 months later So You Think You Can Dance was about to start, so I got a new TV. And Netflix.

#6 TV Debut
It’s still fresh enough that it hurts to talk about. And BTW, Carey, where the H is the video you’ve been promising me.

#5 We have a Winner!
2008 marked the first time EVER I’ve picked/voted for a winner! This category isn’t exclusive to presidents; it also includes boyfriends, sports teams and race horses. Gobama!

#4 Hot Yoga
Ok, we all know I “found” hot yoga this year and we all know I struggled with, um, bodily functions in class. HOWEVER, there was this one time in yoga class… You know what I’m talking about, Liz…… oh man, you guys, this story is one of my most embarrassing ones. And that’s saying something. Any way…

It’s was a while ago. The class was PACKED. We got to this posture and I…. well, hold on. Let me set it up a little bit better. The heater had just turned itself off so it was DEAD fucking silent in the room and behind me were 2 cute boys I had never seen before. So, yeah, we got to this posture and I had reached my edge, but the instructor kept encouraging me to go further. Since I knew, KNEW, that I could put my forehead on the floor, I made the final push…… and then farted. REALLY LOUDLY. For a solid 3 seconds. It even had that little “went up an octave” punctuation mark/crescendo at the end to really solidify that yes, yes indeed, someone had just passed gas.

The teacher was startled; I could hear it in her voice. It wasn’t just a fart, it was another entity in the room and no one, least of all me, wanted to acknowledge its existence.

#3 I rode a Segway
My aforementioned employer gifts a segway to the employees of the months. I was lucky enough to know the EOFM and she was gracious enough to let me ride it. Now, I had never been on a segway before and had NO clue how they worked. My only opinion of them until this point was that douche-y security guards rode them around malls. Oh how I wish someone had told me how they worked BEFORE I stepped onto the platform.

Since I wasn’t aware that they are operated by body weight distribution, when I first stepped on, I did the “back and forth pendulum move coupled with a high pitch scream of death” and then jumped off. Good times.

#2 Blog Me!
I made my blog debut in 2008 and the 3 people reading this will never be the same. Oh, and word on the street is that the original “Blogfather” is in jail in Iran (and we all know how that will end), so I think the name will be up for grabs after he’s stoned to death.

And my number 1 moment of 2008 was………….

#1 My Road trips
Yeah, I’m technically cheating with this one but it’s my list and I can do what I want! I took a vow in 2007 to travel more and travel more I did! I went to 3 brand new places, Colorado, Iowa and Oklahoma (where the wind comes sweeping down the plains). And the best parts were my friends and the adventures we had (awwwwwww…..). Athena, we’ve got to make it back to Lyons. Liz, well, if I ever feel like facing certain death again with your family we’ll go back to Okoboji and Stef….. Daylight Donuts will NEVER be the same for me ever again.

Honorable mentions
-My fan club on Facebook
-The American Royal
-Anything related to Whitney
-Johnny Virgil commenting on my blog
-North Carolina Family Vacation

Here’s to more TV commercials and more great road trips (and less farting) in 2009.

*And man was 2007 terrible! A car wreck, a divorce, a broken heart, (surprise) back taxes and leaving all my good buddies at The Law Firm. Hopefully the upward trend of “not sucking as hard” continues into 2009…

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

i dunno, "more flatulence in '09" has a quaint ring to it.

Natasha said...

"more air from the behin' in Oh-nine"

Clearly, this needs to be my new years resolution.

careybic said...

Um, yeah - so you can blame no commercial on my lazy bones husband. I'm working on it. Seriously. Your hair looks fabulous, by the way. Have a fabulous New Year's and we will see you Friday!

chicfreakcubed said...

I just have to say I laughed and laughed out loud at your, your ass, and your fart's expense. Thanks for that.

Kanadka said...

Happy New Year, Narges!

I was hoping that meeting me would make it to your list, but I'm sure it was number 9. :)

Here's to new friends!

amy * stem * said...

Brilliant. Somehow I am not shocked at all by your Yoga story. I would expect nothing less, actually.

KellyHitchcock said...

Amen to the "not as sucky 2009" upward trend. Fingers crossed that that includes my house selling.